I have a big problem.i like my cousin.?

he is good looking,brainy person.the biggest problem is he is my cousin.the thing is a lot of things have happened between him and me.whenever i speak to him i get too tensed.i try to call him bhaya(elder bro) .i call all my cousins by their names only.once our family had gone to some waterfalls.he was the only male.so he went in first.he told us to come carefully as there was a pit.i did go carefully but i fell into the pit and got hurt.he only came to pull me out of there.i dont know if he did it wid brotherly love or not.i also dont know if i have a crush on him or it is just u know sisterly affection.i dont want to think about him too much and i get too tensed when i talk to him.my cheeks burn.he also spotted that out.please tell me how i can overcome the shyness and talk normally to him as i wanna to like him as sister